Bob and Sharon's Excellent July Adventures!

Dear Friends, 

     Ok, so the photos make it look like all we do is play! If only that was true. Bob's treatment schedule is grueling and demanding for both of us. So, we're trying to make sure that we balance (what, did I say balance????) hard work with hard play on weekends. We're trying to normalize our lives as much as we can. 

     So what's happened in July? Well, Bob made lots of progress in PT and OT:

• Bob progressed from the walker to a single point cane and he's learning how to walk with his head up, shoulders back, and keeping his knee bent so that his gait will look natural. He wears a gait belt with me so that I can intervene safely given his size. 
• Bob was fitted for a special, custom-made foot/leg brace that will articulate his foot and help him not to hyperextend his knee. He was also fitted for a new hand brace that will flex his fingers and wrist.
• Bob walked up and down stairs . . . including the stairs in our home for the first time in 3 months. The physical therapist came to the house and taught him to walk up and down the stairs. We have to wait to practice on our own until the new handrails go up this week, but Jeff Hinkley is on that one! Once they're up, we'll be able to move into our own bedroom. Whoo-hoo!
• We went to the Ahmanson Theater and saw Spamalot! Can you believe it? Bob was a real trooper and said that he'd try an adventure (scary when we have to figure accessibility and bathroom stops).  So when Josh and James came to visit, we got rooms at the LA Marriott after therapy so that Bob could nap and wouldn't have to withstand the play and a long trip home. We even went to dinner before the theater at our favorite little bistro at the Music Center (photos included). What a treat! We both felt like we really got away, even for a night! And Bob said it was "wonderful!"
• Bob's long-lost, newly-found older brother and wife came for a visit from Minnesota. (See picture.) They got to see Bob in action at PT and OT - - he's such a survivor! Thank goodness his brother is also a man of few words so they got along well. 
• Bob walked on the cane in public for the first time to my father's 79th birthday party and he sang happy birthday to my dad! My dad was soooo happy to see his buddy!
• I ordered a Hoyer lift so that we can get Bob in/out of the pool easier/safer. Jeff installed it in their pool so that Bob and I can have pool days. Of course, Jeff, Josh, and James wanted to to catapult Bob into the pool! HA!
• We went to San Clemente and had breakfast with dear friends, Tom and Bonnie. Tom had a similar stroke 10 years ago and is fully recovered, so it was so good for us to share. 
• Believe me, I have my moments of despair so we look to those before us who've made it through, so I know we will make it.  

 

Speech is still Bob's hardest recover and source of frustration and sadness. He works at it so hard and struggles to express language. He's told me that he "just wants to be able to have a conversation".  He is very self conscious. Please pray for his full recovery, especially in speech! And I just miss talking with him about everything. It's so hard but we just have to believe that he will be able to have conversations again.

    Friends, thank you for your patience and continued support and words of encouragement. Although I don't have time to respond personally to each of you, know that I/We appreciate your "reach out and touch". Thank you for remembering us and keeping us in your prayers and thoughts. (Guy, Gail, Gaby, Dianne P., et.al, thank you, thank you!) We plan to rejoin the land of the living and reconnect as soon as we can. 

Much love to all, 

Harvey/Drolet-Sharing Adventures - July 26, 2009

     Tom and I were part of Bob and Sharon's great Adventure. We met Sharon and Bob at Cafe Mimosa in San Clemente on Saturday for lunch. Bob walked to our outside table with his cane and a little help from Sharon. He ate and cut his food by himself. Tom was on his right, so as Tom cracked jokes about pushy and unrelenting wives, Bob had to turn and respond - usually just with a look or laugh.
     That left me to ask the tough questions, which of course I did. No use letting my experience with Tom's stroke in 1997 go to waste. Bob did very well. 

     He needs lots of time and patience to answer, but he does answer! Of course, I wouldn't let him change the subject as he tried to manipulate away from answering. He answered several questions:
What is the easiest? "The easiest is walking."
What is the hardest? "The hardest is speaking."
Sharon asked him what she was wearing on her eyes and he could not retrieve "eyeglasses" so she gave him the starter, " I need these to see, they are my _______" and he filled in the word glasses. 

     Try not to give him options like ABC choices as he is very good at repeating what you say. Ask him open ended questions.
I also asked "what is the weather like today?" After giving me a withering look that said "we're sitting outside, can't you see for yourself?" He answered that it was cooler than home. This took a long time, but he can do it!!! He needs to reconnect his brain centers, so it will take relentless practice. We were together for 2 hours and Bob was included in questions, comments, and ordering his own food. Sharon is wonderful, but bossy!! But we all know that when she puts her mind to something it happens and thank heavens for that! Bob is lucky to have her dedication and love through this period of time. Tom doesn't admit it often, but he told Sharon that she is doing exactly what I did for him and that is what made him get well. He told her to keep it up - Bob of course made a face! Don't you just love him?

Bonnie Drolet & Tom Harvey

Go, Man, Go! (Video of Bob Walking)

Dear Bob, You are a man on a cane! Ha! Look at you go! You are learning to get about on a single point cane and what a liberating thing that is! As we can see in this video, walking is hard work when you have to think through each step, but, you are doing it! I'm so proud of you! 

On An Adventure.......!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi all that love Bob and Sharon, it's me Linda (Sister OutLaw) back from visiting Oregon. Have been emailing them about my life, and new directions ( I Got A Job and am Moving to Oregon...wow for me..... ) I kept calling and emailing cause I wanted to go out and see them.....and.....

Sharon emailed and said they had a week that was long and hard, so they woke up on Friday and decided to GO ON AN ADVENTURE......They packed up and spent the night in San Clemente, went to their favorite food digs, and enjoyed the view of the ocean.

Bob is changing everyday, and she was "feeling" like she should have been blogging more, but after hearing that he had the phyical therapist come to the house, and he walked up their stairs, and down........has more feeling on his right side, and is using the cane on short distances in the house.....am thinking we all are still happy to look at the pictures in the pool over the 4th of July.

Will be going out to see them both face to face next week, so will give an in person update. Hopefully they will be home long enough for me to get a hug.....before another Adventure.

Linda

Keep on Truckin'!

Dearest Bob, Well, it's another Friday night and we're pooped from all of your hard work this week. You're in bed, snoring like a bear in winter, and resting up before we go to the airport to pick up Josh and James. I was worried about hauling you out there but you "said" that you'd sleep until we headed out. I promise that you'll get to sleep in tomorrow --YEAH! You love Saturdays because of that! 

     So what was your week like? Well, I don't know about you, but I feel like we lived at the hospital since it seemed that your therapies were spread out over the . This last week we seemed to spend a lot of time in the schedulers office trying to get your treatments extended. The good news is that your PT and OT have been extended through September because you're showing great improvement. Although speech was extended,  the schedulers are awaiting approval. You are starting to walk on a cane and Dr. Summer has you starting stairs. YEAH! Can't wait to see what the next week brings.

   

Happy 4th of July, Water Baby Bob!

Dear Bob,

     Yes! Today really 

is the 4th of July! Happy birthday, America! We had a fabulous day!

     First, you were happy because you didn't have to get up at o'dark thirty and spend the day at therapy. So was I. It's kind of nice to have no real schedule for the day. Instead, you had a slow day: slept in and ate a late breakfast.

     You're getting used to walking with a walker around the house. You "walked" into the shower and you tried to shower on your own (of course, I'm always there spotting for safety's sake. Our rule is: NO falls - NO breakage). You've learned to use the grab bars in the shower to support your affected arm/hand so that you can scrub your right side and armpit without them hanging heavily. Gravity pulls your arm down and can result in pulling your arm out of its socket, so you're learning to be more mindful of where your right arm/hand are. Who knew that could be so difficult?

    We went to Sonia's and Jeff's for a family pool party and barbeque, and guess what!  You used your walker to walk into their house (with Jeff and me assisting you) AND hooray! You manage all of their entry steps and shocked Nancy! She didn't know you could get out of your wheelchair, let alone, walk! 

     Then, you were a real risk-taker and allowed Jeff and me to "walk" you into the pool. Yes! We got into the pool! Jeff put a life jacket on you and we supported you on both sides. Although you were anxious about falling,  you trusted us as we guided you down the steps- yes - steps to the ledge. We kept your right arm and hand supported on a noodle. You liked sitting in the shallow end AND you exercised: leg lifts,knee to chest, and arm range of motion exercises. I think you liked it more that exercising at home, maybe because the warm water and the weightlessness felt good on your body. I felt like we were on a vacation because their yard is like a resort and we just soaked up the sun and sat in the beautiful blue water and relaxed without a thought. Just like old times! It was soooooo fun! Thank you, Bob, for trying, and thank you Jeff and Chad for making it happen!

     You had another big step toward independence - - you were able to use the bathroom at Son's and Jeff's even though it's not a universal access bathroom. Before your stroke, we never thought of bathroom accessibility, furniture layout, steps/stairs, door and aisle widths, parking, etc., but now all of those things are huge considerations in our outings. No accessibility, no can do. 

     And the grand finale of the day was watching the Redlands fireworks show on Son's and Jeff's patio deck. Although you were pretty tired because you usually nap in the late afternoon and are in bed by 7:45 pm,  you hung in with us. Jeff pulled out the sofa bed for you around 8 so that you could sleep. But you surprised us by waking up in time to come out on the deck and  watch the fireworks with us. I loved sitting in the cool air and watching the bright lights. But it was really fun watching your open mouthed surprise and delight in your face as the fireworks exploded. It was as if this was your first show - well, maybe we just appreciate life all that much more. It was such a great evening! Thanks, Bob, for sharing the day with me! It was the best 4th ever! I love you, forever!

Bob Man Walking!

Video of Bob in PT

Dear Bob, Today is Friday, July 3, 2009. We always start our morning with speech exercises: calendar practice, personal information practice, naming body/face parts practice. We do these exercises not because you don't know them, but so that you'll be able to name them accurately every time. You see, part of your aphasia is that you know the correct answer-but the wrong word comes out when you try to retrieve language. All of your therapists say to you everyday that accuracy comes with "repetition, repetition, repetition". The other night you asked me if I could "please give me your liver" and that frustrated you. We finally figured out that you were trying to say, "please give me a blanket". That was a good thing because handing over my liver was more than I could handle after our long day.

    I added this video of you learning to move your right leg so that our friends and family can see how hard you're working at trying to regain use of your right side. While moving my leg seems so natural, it is an excruciating exercise for you. Part of the difficulty is that you haven't used many muscles on your right side in over two months so they're not used to working. Every day, however, you're getting stronger and stronger. 

   Yesterday Dr. Summer had you walk the halls of the hospital without your walker. I pulled the walking table in front of you just out of your reach in case you needed support but she wouldn't let you hang onto it. Dr. Summer walked behind you and guided your legs. Whoo-hoo! You're learning to trust your body. 

   Today was a big accomplishment! You wanted to try showering on your own! So, Bob, I just spotted for you while you soaped yourself and rinsed yourself. I only had to help you a little. You were so proud of yourself!  

  Well Bob, have a great day! Keep working hard! I love you! 

Dear Friends,

Since we can't travel this summer, please send postcards from your travels so that we can live vicariously. Bob needs your positive thoughts. Tell him: 

BOB, WE BELIEVE IN YOU! Go man, Go!

 

Our address is: 28935 Glenrock Place, Highland, CA 92346

Love, the most wonderful love of your life,

Sharon

Happy Anniversary, Bob!

Dearest Bob,
Happy 24th anniversary! To celebrate this special day, we started out by singing "Happy Anniversary to Us" on our way to your therapies. Although June 25th is a special day for us, it also marked the passing of two icons we grew up with: Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. How weird that you would "moonwalk" (walk backwards) just a few days before. Anyways, we were too tired to go celebrate but Jeff brought a barbeque dinner over and celebrated with us.
You've had some fun and challenges in the past week or so . . . let's see:
1) Linda B. and Justin came to visit with you from Texas. You were so anxious to see them because of your language but they were wonderful! Jeanie and Robin fixed dinner and then we all talked one at a time (hard for me) so that you could follow our conversation. Linda and Justin took the pressure off and shared about their lives and work and you were sooooo happy! AND you toasted them by telling them "Not upset. So glad you came to see me."
2) Nancy, Jeff, Sonia, Chad, Shadi, and my folks came to dinner last Sunday and we set ground rules again about not talking over each other, no side conversations, speaking slowly, and stopping and allowing you to speak when you were ready. OMG! You were amazing! You told us, in your own words, what it's like to try to speak when you can't capture words; that you see language and think in pictures and words, depending on the situation; that you think in sentences and paragraphs, not individual words but then you can't catch the word; that you can read but not word for word; that you can't spell individual words; that you see the whole page and have to put in context. You gave your opinion of mixing pulpit and politics when the table talk was about religion and politics. You were incredible! And then, when you were exhausted, you said, "No more tonight!" And then didn't talk the next day at all except to say "Yes and No".
3) You spoke with your long-lost and newly found brother in Minnesota and sister up north. They were wonderfully patient as you struggled to respond to their sharing with you.
4) PT and OT have been incredible! Dr. S had you on the pilates reformer to strengthen your legs! I wanted to push you off and stick my legs in there but it's only for patients and no offense, I don't really want to become a patient in order to use your equipment.
5) You walked on a walker OUTSIDE of PT. Dr. S said that you were ready to use the walker around the house and in and out of therapy treatments so you've been using the walker. (Except when we shower because we don't want you to slip.) It's exhausting, I know, but the more we practice, the greater the stamina. On the way home from therapy today, I suggested that we practice walking in Lowes, Staples, Stater Bros since they're air-conditioned, level floors, and have wide aisles. You kind of sneered at me but I think it's a pretty good idea, myself. So get ready!
6) Speech is still your hardest therapy, but you are improving - as imperceptible as it is to you and me! We will just work at it and pray alot. AND we know that everyone else is praying, too!
7) Socorro brought you holy water from Lourdes Grotto (St. Bernardette) for you. So, look at all of the miracles!
8) Kiyomi saw you on Saturday, her second visit since your first week in the hospital. She cried from joy at the physical changes in you! She was so worried! You hugged her tightly, as if to say, "don't worry, I'm going to be all right!" And she kept saying, "Oh Bobbu-san, I so happy you look so good!" Well yes! When you think that two months ago you couldn't hold your head up or keep your eyes open and well, you do look so much better now.

9) You are learning to stand on your own without support - learning to trust that your right leg will support you. Dr. Summer says that's what rehab is all about: remembering and relearning what your body already knows AND learning new paths for that which was lost. But she has total faith in you and so do I, Bob! So trust your right side, Bob! Keep putting weight on it! ! Rachelle, your OT, says that your right biceps are beginning to kick in and she's pretty excited that your arm will come back. She said it comes in sequence so your hand will be the last to kick in but she's very hopeful, too! I just LOVE your little angels! And they can't be older than 30! Remarkable!

I love you, Bob! Keep working hard!

July 1st and a "Big" Update.....

Hi, it's Linda (Sister Outlaw), signing in from Grants Pass Oregon, up north visiting my daughter and grandchildren for a couple of weeks. Wanted to give you Sharon's update for today, July 1st.

You know I always email her with what's going on in my life, and she's replies when she can, but knows I will spread the word on the progress of Bob and Sharon.

So, this morning at 10:30am I got a message that Bob was at PT and "WALKED" in to the Rehab appointment with his walker. From the car, to door, easy is 30 feet, then door to workout room another 75 feet. It's a long way.........

She also said they went to Bob's favorite restuarant, one he took Sharon and I to two weeks ago, called Carolyns Cafe, and it was great at that time going in with the wheelchair, and sitting in the booth. This time, he walked in with the walker. Again, a distance of 75 feet at least.

Also, Sharon said that his appointment with the speech therapist yesterday was one of those days, when she couldn't believe how much he had improved.When "they" say that, it means WOW....

As we all celebrate this July 4th weekend, enjoying all our Country allows us to be and do.....as a group we are all praying for continued Mircles for Bob.